Dad’s Group Study Guide | December 28, 2025
Opening Prayer
Father, we thank You for bringing us together as fathers seeking to follow Your will. As we close out this year and prepare for the next, we acknowledge that our lives are shaped by thousands of choices. Help us to make decisions that honor You, bless our families, and move us forward in Your purpose. Give us wisdom to forget what lies behind, courage to press forward, and compassion to encourage others along the way. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
The Weight of Our Choices
Choices, studies estimate that we make approximately 35,000 decisions every day. From what we wear to how we respond to our children, from career moves to financial decisions, our lives are a continuous stream of choices. As we stand at the threshold of a new year, we carry with us 12 million+ decisions from 2025—some wise, some rushed, some faithful, and some we wish we could take back.
The challenge isn’t just making good choices; it’s dealing with the bad ones. The enemy wants us to stay defeated by our poor decisions, but God offers us something different: the grace to move forward, the power to choose life, and the calling to help others do the same.
Key Truth: Life is shaped not only by what happens to us but by the choices we make in response to those circumstances.
Point 1: Forget the Past Choices
Scripture: Philippians 3:13-14 (NIV)
“Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.”
Understanding the Text
Paul wrote these words as someone intimately familiar with regret. Before his conversion, he had persecuted Christians, approved of their deaths, and caused immeasurable harm to the early church. He imprisoned believers and terrorized families. Yet here he declares that while the past happened and mattered, it no longer controls him.
Paul isn’t saying the past didn’t matter—he’s saying it doesn’t have the right to control our future.
The Difference Between Condemnation and Conviction
- Condemnation always comes from the devil. It pushes you away from God with messages like: “God doesn’t love you anymore. Why should He? Look what you’ve done. Why even try again? You failed last time; you’ll probably fail again.”
- Conviction always comes from the Holy Spirit. It draws you closer to God with the voice that says: “Come back. Get up. Return to Me. There’s still hope. Let’s move forward together.”
Key Scripture: Matthew 11:28 (NIV) – “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”
Application for Dads
As fathers, we carry unique burdens of regret:
- “I haven’t been the best parent. I haven’t loved my kids like I should.”
- “I haven’t directed them toward God like I should have.”
- “I haven’t been an example I’m proud of.”
- “I’ve been unfaithful, unloving, or absent in my marriage.”
- “I’ve made poor financial decisions that hurt my family.”
The Truth: You can’t change yesterday, but you can choose differently today.
God asks us not to erase the past but to release it. To let go of the control it has over us. This is an active choice—choosing freedom over guilt, choosing healing over bitterness, choosing to believe God’s grace is sufficient.
Discussion Questions
- What decision from the past year (or further back) do you find yourself replaying or regretting? How has holding onto it affected your present?
Sample answers to promote discussion:
- “I lost my temper with my son during a baseball game last spring. I can still see the look on his face. I’ve apologized, but I keep replaying it, and now I find myself being overly cautious or distant because I’m afraid I’ll mess up again.”
- “I chose to take a job that required more travel, thinking it would provide better for my family. But I missed so much time with my kids. I regret that choice, and it’s made me hesitant to pursue any career advancement because I’m afraid of making the same mistake.”
- “I wasn’t there for my wife when she really needed me a few years ago. I was too focused on work and my own stress. That regret has made me either overcompensate to the point of exhaustion or pull back emotionally because I don’t trust my own judgment anymore.”
- “I made some poor financial decisions early in our marriage—debt we’re still paying off. Every time money gets tight, I feel like a failure, and it affects how I lead our family financially today.”
- How can you tell the difference in your own life between condemnation (from the enemy) and conviction (from the Holy Spirit)?
- Sample answers to promote discussion:
- “Condemnation makes me want to hide from God and avoid prayer. Conviction makes me want to run TO God and talk to Him about it. That’s usually how I know which voice I’m hearing.”
- “When I hear ‘You’re a terrible father and you’ll never change,’ that’s condemnation—it’s hopeless and attacking my identity. When I hear ‘That wasn’t your best moment, but you can apologize and do better tomorrow,’ that’s conviction—it’s specific and offers a path forward.”
- “Condemnation keeps bringing up the same failure over and over, even after I’ve repented. Conviction deals with it once, leads me to repentance, and then moves me forward. The Holy Spirit doesn’t keep rehashing what’s already been forgiven.”
- “I’ve noticed condemnation makes me defensive and want to justify myself or blame others. Conviction makes me humble and willing to own my mistake and make it right.”
- What would it practically look like for you to “release” a past failure without forgetting the lesson it taught you?Sample answers to promote discussion:
- “I think it means I can acknowledge that I made a mistake, learned from it, and then stop letting it define me. Like, ‘Yes, I failed as a dad in that moment, but I’m not a failure as a dad. God’s grace is bigger than that one moment.'”
- “For me, releasing it might mean finally forgiving myself the way God has already forgiven me. I can remember the lesson—like ‘don’t let work consume me’—without carrying the shame of ‘you’re a bad husband.'”
- “Practically, it might mean stopping the replay in my mind. When that memory comes up, instead of dwelling on it, I thank God for His forgiveness and remind myself of what I learned, then redirect my thoughts to how I can do better today.”
- “I think it means being able to talk about it without the emotional weight crushing me. Like I can say, ‘Yeah, I made that mistake and here’s what I learned,’ without spiraling into guilt and shame every time it comes up.”
Point 2: Press Forward Toward the Future
Scripture: Deuteronomy 30:19-20 (NIV)
“This day I call the heavens and the earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live and that you may love the LORD your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the LORD is your life, and he will give you many years in the land he swore to give to your fathers, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.”
Scripture: Joshua 24:15 (NIV)
“But if serving the LORD seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your ancestors served beyond the Euphrates, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the LORD.”
Understanding the Choice
God placed before Israel a clear choice: life or death, blessing or curse. This wasn’t a manipulation or threat—it was an invitation to partnership with Him. The same choice stands before us today.
Pressing forward doesn’t happen accidentally. It requires intentional, faith-filled decisions to:
- Choose life-giving relationships
- Choose obedience over convenience
- Choose faith even when the future feels uncertain
- Choose to invest in what matters eternally
Areas Where Dads Must Choose Life
In Your Marriage: “I can’t change how I acted last year, but I can choose life in my marriage today. I can choose to love, to serve, to be faithful, to be present.”
With Your Children: “I haven’t been the parent I wanted to be, but today I choose life with my kids. I will invest in them, direct them toward God, and be the example they need.”
In Your Career: “I will pursue work that has purpose and meaning, not just a paycheck. I will choose to steward my time and talents for God’s glory.”
With Your Finances: “I haven’t managed money well, but I won’t give up. I choose life—to be intentional, to seek wisdom, to be generous, to trust God as my provider.”
In Your Church: “I haven’t been involved or invested like I should, but I choose to press forward. I will engage, serve, and be part of God’s family here.”
The Store Checkout Analogy
Pastor Andy shared about being in a store, watching people navigate different checkout lines, trying to choose the fastest one. We’ve all done this—we pick a line, then watch another move faster, and regret our choice. We get deeper into our line, with people behind us, feeling stuck even though we made the wrong call.
Life is like this. We make choices that take us down paths we later regret. We get “deeper in the line” and wonder how to get out. The good news? God’s grace is the express lane. You can always repent, turn around, and choose a different path.
Discussion Questions
- In which area of your life (marriage, parenting, career, finances, church) do you most need to “choose life” in 2026?Sample answers to promote discussion:
- “Honestly, my marriage. We’re not in crisis, but we’re roommates more than partners. I need to choose to pursue my wife again—date nights, conversations that go deeper than logistics, showing her I still choose her every day.”
- “Parenting, for sure. My kids are getting older, and I feel like I’m losing connection with them. I need to choose to put down my phone, be present, ask better questions, and really invest in knowing who they’re becoming.”
- “My church involvement. I’ve been a Sunday attender for years, but I’m not serving or connected to other men. I need to choose to get involved, to serve, to be part of community instead of just being a consumer.”
- “Finances. I’ve been living paycheck to paycheck and not stewarding what God’s given us well. I need to choose to get on a budget, start giving consistently, and trust God as my provider instead of living in constant financial anxiety.”
- “My career. I’m in a job that pays well but drains my soul. I need to choose to pursue work that has meaning and purpose, even if it means taking a risk or making less money initially.”
- What does “pressing forward” practically look like for you in the coming year? What intentional steps will you take?Sample answers to promote discussion:
- “For me, pressing forward means having a weekly date night with my wife—non-negotiable. And going to counseling together. Those are two concrete steps I’m committing to.”
- “I’m going to do breakfast with each of my kids one-on-one once a month. Just me and them, no distractions. And I’m going to start praying with them at bedtime instead of just having my wife do it.”
- “Pressing forward looks like joining a serve team at church and committing to this dads group for the full year. I need accountability and community, not just good intentions.”
- “I’m going to meet with a financial counselor in January and set up a real budget. And I’m going to start tithing consistently, even if it feels scary at first. I need to trust God with my finances.”
- “I’m going to have an honest conversation with my boss about workload and boundaries. And I’m going to start looking for opportunities that align better with my values and gifts, even if it takes time to transition.”
- “Practically, I need to set boundaries with work—no checking emails after 7pm, being home for family dinners. And I’m going to start a morning routine of prayer and Scripture before the day gets crazy.”
- Where do you feel “stuck in the wrong line”? What would it take to acknowledge the wrong turn and choose God’s way forward?Sample answers to promote discussion:
- “I feel stuck in a pattern of pornography. I’m deep in the line with shame and secrecy piled up behind me. It would take humility to confess it to someone I trust and ask for accountability. That’s terrifying, but I know that’s the express lane to freedom.”
- “I’m stuck in the ‘career success will make me happy’ line. I’ve invested years climbing the ladder, and admitting I chose wrong feels like wasting all that time and effort. But I know God’s calling me to something different. It would take courage to pivot.”
- “I’m stuck in trying to control everything in my family. I parent out of fear instead of faith. Acknowledging that would mean admitting I don’t trust God as much as I claim to. It would take surrendering control and trusting Him with my kids’ futures.”
- “I’m in the wrong line with anger. I inherited it from my dad, and I’ve been in this line for years. Getting out would mean going to counseling, dealing with root issues, and learning new patterns. That feels overwhelming, but I know it’s necessary.”
- “I’m stuck in the ‘I’ll get serious about my faith later’ line. I keep saying I’ll prioritize God when work settles down or when the kids are older. But the line just keeps getting longer. I need to acknowledge that ‘later’ never comes and choose God TODAY.”
Point 3: Encourage Others to Do the Same
Scripture: Luke 22:31-32 (NIV)
“Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift all of you as wheat. But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers.”
The Power of Restoration
This conversation happened before Peter’s greatest failure—denying Jesus three times. Jesus knew Peter would make terrible choices in the coming hours, yet He didn’t focus on the failure. Instead, He:
- Prayed for Peter’s faith to endure through the failure
- Anticipated Peter’s restoration (“when you have turned back”)
- Gave Peter a mission to strengthen others after his restoration
Key Truth: God never restores us for ourselves alone. He restores us so we can encourage others.
From the Prodigal to the Encourager
The story of the Prodigal Son (Luke 15:11-32) shows the moment of choice: “When he came to his senses…” That’s the turning point. The son realized where he was, how much better his father’s house was, and made the choice to return.
Many of us entering 2026 need that same moment of clarity:
- To come to our senses about destructive patterns
- To recognize how far we’ve drifted from God’s best
- To turn around and return home
- To help others do the same
Your Story Is Someone Else’s Hope
When God restores you—when He helps you forget the past and press forward—you become living proof that change is possible. Your transformation becomes an encouragement to other fathers who are struggling with the same battles.
“If God could restore me… if God gave me another chance… if God helped me with my decisions… He can do the same for you.”
Walking Together, Not Alone
God isn’t calling us to walk alone into 2026. He’s calling us to:
- Walk alongside other men who are pressing forward
- Strengthen brothers who are struggling with their choices
- Share our stories of God’s grace and restoration
- Point others upward and onward, not just inward
This is why groups like this matter. We’re not here just to hear good teaching—we’re here to encourage each other through the journey of choices, failures, grace, and growth.
Discussion Questions
- Think of a time when someone’s testimony of God’s restoration encouraged you. What impact did it have?Sample answers to promote discussion:
- “A guy in my men’s group shared how God restored his marriage after he had an affair. I was going through a rough patch with my wife, and hearing that God could redeem even that level of brokenness gave me hope that He could help us too. It kept me from giving up.”
- “My own dad shared with me about his struggles with anger when I was growing up and how God helped him change. Knowing he struggled with the same things I do—and that God helped him—made me believe I could change too. It made me want to be honest about my own struggles.”
- “I heard a testimony from a dad who had been distant from his kids but God restored those relationships. At the time, I felt like I’d missed my chance because my kids were teenagers. But his story showed me it’s never too late. I started making changes that week.”
- “A friend shared about coming back to God after walking away for years. I was in a similar place—not hostile to God, just distant and going through the motions. His story reminded me that God was waiting for me to come home, not to condemn me but to welcome me back.”
- Who in your life needs encouragement right now regarding their choices? How can you strengthen them this week?Sample answers to promote discussion:
- “My brother-in-law is struggling in his marriage. I think he needs to hear that I’ve been there, that it’s worth fighting for, and that God can help. I’m going to reach out and invite him to lunch this week.”
- “There’s a dad at church who just went through a divorce. I can tell he’s carrying a lot of shame. I want to encourage him that God isn’t done with him and that failure doesn’t disqualify him from God’s love or purpose. Maybe just a text to let him know I’m praying for him.”
- “My teenage son is beating himself up over some decisions he made this semester—grades, friend choices. He needs to hear that mistakes don’t define him and that God’s grace is bigger than his failures. I need to have that conversation with him this week.”
- “A coworker mentioned he’s been thinking about coming to church but feels like he’s ‘too far gone.’ I want to share my own story of how God met me when I felt the same way. I’m going to invite him to coffee and just be honest about my journey.”
- “My accountability partner has been struggling with the same issue for months and is getting discouraged. He needs to hear that setbacks aren’t permanent and that God’s strength is made perfect in weakness. I need to remind him of how far he’s actually come.”
- What story of God’s grace in your life could encourage another dad? Are you willing to share it?Sample answers to promote discussion:
- “God restored my relationship with my oldest son after years of distance and conflict. I was a harsh, controlling father, and he pulled away. Through counseling and a lot of humility, God helped me change and healed our relationship. If that could encourage another dad who feels like he’s lost his kids, I’d share it.”
- “I struggled with alcohol for years—functional alcoholic, nobody really knew. God delivered me and I’ve been sober for three years now. If sharing that could help another dad admit he has a problem and seek help, it’s worth the vulnerability.”
- “My wife and I almost divorced five years ago. We were done. But God intervened through a pastor who challenged us to give Him six months. We did, and God completely transformed our marriage. If that story could give hope to a dad who’s ready to walk away, I need to share it.”
- “I was a workaholic who missed so much of my kids’ childhood. God convicted me and helped me make hard changes—turned down a promotion, set boundaries, chose to be present. My relationship with my kids today is proof of God’s redemption. I’d share that with any dad who’s choosing career over family.”
- “I went through a season of depression where I couldn’t see any hope. God met me in that darkness through medication, counseling, and the prayers of faithful friends. If sharing that could help another dad who’s struggling with mental health know that it’s not a lack of faith to get help, I absolutely would.”
- “I’m still in the middle of my story with God’s grace—struggling with patience as a father, learning to trust Him with my finances, growing in my faith. Maybe the encouragement is that God’s still working on me too. None of us have arrived, and that’s okay.”
Closing Application: 35,000 Choices in 2026
As we enter the new year, you will make approximately 35,000 decisions every day. That’s 12,775,000 choices in 2026. The question isn’t whether you’ll make some bad ones—you will. The question is: What will you do with those bad choices?
The Three-Point Framework about choices
1. Forget the Past
- Release the control that yesterday’s failures have over you
- Refuse condemnation and embrace conviction
- Accept God’s grace as sufficient for every mistake
2. Press Forward Toward the Future
- Make intentional, faith-filled choices daily
- Choose life in your marriage, parenting, career, finances, and church
- Trust that God’s plans for you are good
3. Encourage Others
- Share your story of restoration
- Strengthen brothers who are struggling
- Walk together toward God’s best
A Prayer for 2026
“Father, as I enter this new year, I acknowledge that I will make thousands upon thousands of choices. Help me to forget what lies behind—not to erase it, but to release its control over me. Give me the courage to press forward, choosing life in every area You’ve entrusted to me. And make me an encourager, using my story of Your grace to strengthen others. Thank You that Your mercies are new every morning, that Your grace is sufficient, and that You’re not finished with me yet. In Jesus’ name, Amen.”
This Week’s Challenge
Choose one area where you need to “choose life” in 2026. Write down:
- The specific choice you need to make
- One practical step you’ll take this week
- One person you’ll share this commitment with for accountability
Then, encourage one other dad this week by sharing how God has restored you in an area where you once failed.
Additional Scripture for Meditation
- Isaiah 43:18-19 – “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing!”
- Lamentations 3:22-23 – “Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.”
- 2 Corinthians 5:17 – “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!”
- Proverbs 3:5-6 – “Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”
Final Thought
You’re standing at a powerful moment—the end of one year and the beginning of another. Behind you are 12 million+ decisions, some you’re proud of and some you regret. Ahead of you is a year full of unknowns but also full of opportunities.
The grace of God is this: You get to choose.
Choose life. Choose to press forward. Choose to encourage others.
And remember—God has already prayed for you. Just like Jesus prayed for Peter before his failure, God is interceding for you right now. He knows you’ll make some wrong choices in the days ahead, but He’s already planned your restoration and given you a mission: to strengthen others.
That’s the power of God’s grace. That’s the gift of new beginnings.
As for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.
Session 26 | Be The Dads | Based on “Choices, We All Have Them” | Pastor Andy | December 28, 2025
