Peter’s story mirrors our own: we experience change, collapse, and then—through Jesus—comeback. A setback is a setup for a comeback as we know from Willie Jolly’s visit and book.
1. THE CHANGE — Matthew 16:13–18
Scripture:
“But who do you say I am?”
Simon Peter answered, “You are the Messiah, the Son of the living God.”
… “You are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church.”
Sermon Insight:
When Simon confessed Jesus as the Messiah, Jesus changed his name to Peter (“rock”). This wasn’t based on:
- His past
- His mistakes
- His performance
It was based on who he would become.
Jesus heals your past, meets you in the present, and speaks hope over your future.
But Satan tries to name you by:
- your failures
- your addiction
- your shortcomings
- your past mistakes
Jesus names you according to your identity, not your history.
Key Takeaway for Dads:
Your identity comes from Christ, not from your record as a dad.
Practical Application:
Write down the names you’ve believed (failure, angry dad, not enough) and replace them with Jesus’ names (redeemed, forgiven, rock, called, new creation).
Related BeTheDads.com Posts:
- “Who Are You Really?”
- “Walking in Your New Identity as a Father”
2. THE COLLAPSE — Luke 22:54–62 (Courtyard Denial)
Scripture:
“Man, I don’t know what you’re talking about!”
And immediately, the rooster crowed.
Sermon Insight:
Peter meant it when he said he’d never abandon Jesus.
But his collapse revealed that he was relying on:
- his own strength
- his own resolve
- his own willpower
And when pressure came, that foundation crumbled.
The sermon emphasized:
The Christian life is not about trying harder — it’s about surrendering deeper.
Longevity as a dad comes from being God-reliant, not self-reliant.
Key Takeaway for Dads:
You don’t overcome anger, distance, burnout, or discouragement by trying harder.
You do it by surrendering more to Jesus.
Practical Application:
Name one area you’ve been relying on your own strength. Pray:
“Lord, I surrender this. Be strong where I am weak.”
Related BeTheDads.com Posts:
- “When Trying Harder Isn’t Working”
- “Letting God Be Your Strength”
3. THE COMEBACK — John 21:1–19
Scripture:
“Throw your net on the right side…”
“It is the Lord!”
“Peter jumped into the water…”
“Do you love Me?”
Sermon Insight:
After the resurrection, Jesus recreated the miracle from Peter’s early days—the miraculous catch of fish.
Why?
To bring Peter back to his anchor point—
the moment grace first changed his life.
Then, three times Jesus asked:
“Do you love Me?”
One question for every denial.
This was complete restoration.
Jesus doesn’t meet you at your collapse.
He meets you at your calling.
Key Takeaway for Dads:
Your comeback isn’t about proving yourself to your wife or kids.
It’s about returning to Jesus and showing up from your true identity.
Practical Application:
Identify your anchor point with God—
the moment He saved you, called you, restored you.
Let that be the place your comeback begins.
Related BeTheDads.com Posts:
- “Winning Back Trust With Your Kids Starts With Today”
- “Just Show Up: The Power of Presence in Fatherhood”
SPECIAL COMEBACK TEACHING EMPHASIS
“The Comeback Isn’t About Proving Yourself — It’s About Returning to Identity in Christ and Showing Up.”
Peter didn’t earn his comeback.
He didn’t negotiate it.
He didn’t promise to “do better.”
He simply showed up on the shore when he heard,
“It’s the Lord.”
This is your path too, dad.
Your comeback starts when you stop trying to prove who you are…
and start living from who Jesus says you are.
COMBEBACK DISCUSSION QUESTIONS (35 min)
1. The Change
- Question: What false names or labels have you believed about yourself as a dad? What names has Jesus spoken over you instead?
- Related BeTheDads.com Content:
- Session 6: The Father’s Heart – Moving from Performance to Presence — teaches about identity in Christ vs. performance. https://bethedads.com/2025/07/session-6-the-fathers-heart-moving-from-performance-to-presence/
- Redeeming Dads: Embracing Forgiveness for A Powerful Fatherhood — helps dads let go of past mistakes and live from God’s forgiveness. https://bethedads.com/2024/02/redeeming-dads-embracing-forgiveness-for-a-powerful-fatherhood/
- Starter Answer / Reflection Points:
- Many dads believe labels like “failure,” “not enough,” “absent,” or “too angry.”
- But Jesus calls us “child of God,” “redeemed,” “new creation,” “called,” “rock.”
- Recognizing those true names helps free us from guilt and performance-driven fathering and gives us a foundation in God’s grace.
2. The Collapse
- Question: Where do you see yourself relying on your own strength instead of God’s grace? How does pride or self-reliance show up in your parenting or marriage?
- Related BeTheDads.com Content:
- When Leaders Fail: Turning Back to God as Fathers — helps fathers admit failure and lean back into God’s strength. https://bethedads.com/2025/08/when-leaders-fail-turning-back-to-god-as-fathers
- Dads, When Change Is Coming but You Don’t Know What’s Next — encourages trusting God rather than controlling outcomes. https://bethedads.com/2025/08/dads-when-change-is-coming-but-you-dont-know-whats-next/
- Starter Answer / Reflection Points:
- Maybe you try to “fix things” by yourself — anger, financial stress, family conflict — instead of admitting you need help.
- Pride may look like thinking, “If I just try harder, I can do this,” rather than saying, “God, I need You.”
- Recognizing self-reliance is the first step toward surrender — and surrender opens the door for God’s power to work in your fatherhood.
3. The Comeback
- Question: What “anchor point” in your walk with Jesus can you return to? What first step of comeback do you sense God calling you to make?
- Related BeTheDads.com Content:
- Session 12: Being Dads that Know How to Turn Back & Head Home — explores returning to God, recognizing drift, and coming home. https://bethedads.com/2025/09/session-12being-dads-that-knowhow-to-turn-back-head-home
- The Future Is Now! So, We Can’t Wait to Be the Dads — calls dads to live in obedience now, not wait until later. https://bethedads.com/2025/03/the-future-is-now-so-we-cant-wait-to-be-the-dads
- Starter Answer / Reflection Points:
- Your anchor point might be a moment of salvation, a time God radically changed your heart, or a memory of faith in your own upbringing.
- A first step could be: share that with your kids, spend time in prayer to deepen that identity, ask forgiveness in a relationship, or recommit to a spiritual discipline.
- Emphasize that the comeback doesn’t have to be dramatic — it’s often about small, faithful steps to rebuild, restore, and walk in God’s grace.
4. Identity vs. Proving Yourself
- Question: Have you been trying to prove yourself to your kids or wife? What would it look like to simply show up from your identity in Christ instead?
- Related BeTheDads.com Content:
- Session 6: The Father’s Heart – Moving from Performance to Presence — again, very relevant here. https://bethedads.com/2025/07/session-6-the-fathers-heart-moving-from-performance-to-presence
- Redeeming Dads: Embracing Forgiveness for A Powerful Fatherhood — also helps with shifting from performance (“I have to prove”) to receiving grace. https://bethedads.com/2024/02/redeeming-dads-embracing-forgiveness-for-a-powerful-fatherhood
- Starter Answer / Reflection Points:
- Yes, many dads feel they must “earn” respect, love, or forgiveness from their family by how well they perform.
- But showing up from identity means: being present, owning your mistakes, leading with humility, and loving without needing to earn applause.
- It might look like: apologizing when you’ve messed up, choosing quality time over “making it up,” and being consistent even when you’re not “at your best.”
Additional Comeback Small-Group Tip
To help deepen the discussion, you might:
- Encourage each dad to share one anchor point (good or bad) from their past and how that shapes their comeback.
- Pray in pairs or triads at the end of your discussion: ask God to highlight a specific next step and give courage to walk it out.
- Use BeTheDads’ community resource: remind the group that they’re not alone — as Grow in Community! Don’t Do Life Alone encourages. https://bethedads.com/2025/01/grow-in-community-dont-do-life-alone-join-one-now
PERSONAL COMEBACK REFLECTION & APPLICATION (15 min)
Quiet reflection prompts:
- “Jesus, where do I need a comeback in my life?”
- “What lies have I been believing about my identity?”
- “Where am I trying to prove myself instead of showing up in Your grace?”
Write out:
- One thing you’re leaving behind
- One truth about your identity in Christ
- One comeback action you’ll take this week
Optional journal prompt:
Write a short letter to your child or spouse beginning with:
“I’m choosing a comeback because God is making me new, and you matter deeply to me…”
COMEBACK COMMITMENT & CLOSING PRAYER (10 min)
Commitment:
Each dad names one specific comeback action for the next 7 days:
- A conversation
- A prayer
- An apology
- A date night
- A habit
- A step of surrender
Closing Prayer:
“Lord, thank You for being the God of comeback stories. For every dad here, rewrite the chapters that have been marked by failure, fear, shame, or distance. Fill us with Your Spirit. Restore what’s broken, strengthen what’s weak, and lead us to be the dads our wives and kids need. We trust You, Jesus. Our story is a comeback story because You are in it. In Your name we pray, Amen.”
