WHAT and HOW are both important in the way we choose to be the dads.

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Do you realize the importance of the combination of what and how? I remember in my last job how when they were doing reviews they had what they called a 9-box where they had a scale of 3 for each of these areas. They had one axis be about the WHAT, what got done, the deliverables, the outcomes, the experiences. The other axis was the HOW, how did you get it done, how did you work with others, how did you achieve the outcomes.

Looking at life through the 2 perspectives allows for knowing if things were getting done in a sustainable way. If you get a lot done, the WHAT but you aren’t doing it in a way that scales or you are doing it in a destructive or hurtful way, then the odds are it won’t be sustainable. On the flip side, if you are living life well with a great HOW but not able to deliver there is another problem and again it won’t be sustainable or helpful.

9-BOXHowNeeds ImprovementStrongExceeds expectations
Exceeds expectations
Needs Improvement
Which cell would you land in?

WHAT and How are you doing to be the dads?

Are you strong on what is getting done? Do you need to make some improvements? Are you exceeding expectations?

WHAT – Getting Things Done:

  1. Example: Diligence and Responsibility
    • Scripture: Proverbs 12:24 (NIV) – “Diligent hands will rule, but laziness ends in forced labor.”
    • Application: Being diligent in your responsibilities as a father, providing for your family, and ensuring that the needs are met reflects strength in the WHAT aspect. This aligns with biblical principles of hard work and responsibility.
  2. Example: Nurturing and Providing for the Family
    • Scripture: 1 Timothy 5:8 (NIV) – “Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.”
    • Application: Taking care of the material needs of your family is essential. This involves not only providing financially but also ensuring emotional and spiritual support. Striving to exceed expectations in these areas aligns with biblical teachings.

WHAT and HOW are you living in order to be the dads?

Are you strong on how you are being the dads for your wives and kids? Do you need to make some improvements in either of those areas? Are you exceeding expectations in one or both of them?

HOW – Living as Fathers:

  1. Example: Love and Sacrifice
    • Scripture: Ephesians 5:25 (NIV) – “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.”
    • Application: Emulating the sacrificial love of Christ in your relationships, especially with your wife, demonstrates a strong HOW. This involves selflessness, understanding, and a willingness to sacrifice for the well-being of your family.
  2. Example: Patience and Guidance
    • Scripture: Colossians 3:21 (NIV) – “Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.”
    • Application: Being patient, avoiding harshness, and providing gentle guidance to your children align with a positive HOW. This reflects the biblical principle of nurturing a loving and encouraging environment within the family.

When it comes to the how and the what for you and your family it matters:

Remember, these examples provide a foundation, and each family dynamic is unique. Regular self-reflection, prayer, and seeking guidance from biblical teachings can help you continuously improve and align your actions with strong biblical principles in both WHAT and HOW aspects of fatherhood.


Verse: 1 Peter 2:12

Live such good lives among the pagans that, though they accuse you of doing wrong, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day he visits us.

Firstly, let’s be the dads who live good lives in how we love on and treat our wives and kids. Secondly, let’s be the dads who even the people at work or in the neighborhood notice and start asking questions. Thirdly, let’s be the dads who live up to the calling of God on our lives so that when they see us they glorify God!

WHAT and HOW we choose to live our lives, Jesus with skin on, to the world around us:

Today’s Devotional starts with talking about how the Church is always looking for ways to improve ministries to be able to draw and engage people while sharing our faith. “We need to be geared to the times as we proclaim the unchanging message of Christ.” It also calls out how “we want to reach our contemporary culture, and every generation devises its own techniques and systems.”

Do we need to change?

Today’s Devotional then stops us with a “But wait!” to point us back as today’s verse speaks to us to the reality that “sometimes the methods don’t have to change.” We are to be Jesus with skin on! We are to be living our lives in the light of Jesus and reflecting it into the world around us!

How to keep the main thing the main thing:

Let’s be the dads who shine so bright and are spicing things up in the right way like good salt so that others will see the good works and glorify our Father in heaven! Today’s Devotional speaks to how if we live our lives shining the hope of Jesus it opens the door for them to “ask us about it.” Remember what 1 Peter 3:15 and 1 Peter 3:16 say?

But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander.

Today’s Devotional next points us to Matthew 5:16 which tells us:

In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.

Which brings us back to the verse associated with Today’s Devotional, 1 Peter 2:12 above.

Let’s be the dads who grab onto the message from Today’s Devotional:

“God’s message is Christ. His method is you.”

Walking with God by David Jeremiah

Men are God’s method. The Church is looking for better methods; God is looking for better men.


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