Centered! Self-centered or Christ-centered? In your marriage what will be your focus?

Sermon notes:

  • Look at the authentic
  • How can we grow in our walk with God?
  • God’s original intent
  • Mark 10:1-12
    • ‘Getting up, He left there (Capernaum) and went to the region of Judea and beyond the Jordan; and crowds gathered around Him again and accompanied Him, and as was His custom, He once more began to teach them. Pharisees came to Jesus to test Him [intending to trick Him into saying something wrong], and asked Him, “Is it lawful [according to Scripture] for a man to divorce his wife and send her away?” He replied to them, “What did Moses command you?” They said, “Moses allowed a man to write a certificate of divorce and to send her away .” But Jesus said to them, “Because of your hardness of hearts [your callousness and insensitivity toward your wives and the provision of God] he wrote you this precept. But from the beginning of creation God made them male and female. For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother [to establish a home with his wife], and the two shall become one flesh; so that they are no longer two, but [are united as] one flesh. Therefore, what God has united and joined together, man must not separate [by divorce].” In the house the disciples began questioning Him again about this. And He said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her; and if a woman divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery.” ‘ Mark 10:1-12
  • It’s important and so we must proceed with diligence and care
  • God wants to use marriage to bless
  • Legacy comes out of this bond
  • It’s a commitment to God
  • God is going to disciple us through marriage
  • It will impact our kids and grandkids and others
  • Need to take it to heart
  • Nobody has a perfect story
  • Be it broken, blended or God’s grace filled
  • Beneficial to a Christ-centered life
  • Honoring each other – choosing the other over ourselves and serve one another
  • #1 place of ministry
  • Communication – express rather than demand
  • Jeremiah 17:7-8
    • ‘Blessed [with spiritual security] is the man who believes and trusts in and relies on the L ord And whose hope and confident expectation is the L ord . For he will be [nourished] like a tree planted by the waters, That spreads out its roots by the river; And will not fear the heat when it comes; But its leaves will be green and moist. And it will not be anxious and concerned in a year of drought Nor stop bearing fruit. ‘ Jeremiah 17:7-8
  • Consider the lyrics of Jesus Jesus precious Jesus (Hymn 35)
  • Need to learn how to read each other
  • Be responsible for what you said if it hurts the other and apologize for real. (not an if I … but an real I am sorry since the “if” negates the rest of the apology)
  • Need to give encouragement and strength
  • Help our wives chase their dreams
  • When there is an issue, put it on the table and pray about it and attack the problem together
  • Ephesians 5:21-32
    • ‘Speak to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, [offering praise by] singing and making melody with your heart to the Lord; always giving thanks to God the Father for all things, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ; being subject to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as [a service] to the Lord. For the husband is head of the wife, as Christ is head of the church, Himself being the Savior of the body. But as the church is subject to Christ, so also wives should be subject to their husbands in everything [respecting both their position as protector and their responsibility to God as head of the house]. Husbands, love your wives [seek the highest good for her and surround her with a caring, unselfish love], just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, so that He might sanctify the church, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word [of God], so that [in turn] He might present the church to Himself in glorious splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy [set apart for God] and blameless. Even so husbands should and are morally obligated to love their own wives as [being in a sense] their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own body, but [instead] he nourishes and protects and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members (parts) of His body. For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother and shall be joined [and be faithfully devoted] to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This mystery [of two becoming one] is great; but I am speaking with reference to [the relationship of] Christ and the church. ‘ Ephesians 5:19-32
  • Submission and sacrifice
  • Honor propensity to submission
  • No empty apologies so don’t start it with IF
  • Apologies bring healing
  • To Forgive
    • forgiving as Jesus does
    • As far as the east is from the west – Psalms 103:12
      • ‘As far as the east is from the west, So far has He removed our transgressions from us. ‘ Psalms 103:12
    • God’s definition of love:
      • ‘Love endures with patience and serenity, love is kind and thoughtful, and is not jealous or envious; love does not brag and is not proud or arrogant. It is not rude; it is not self-seeking, it is not provoked [nor overly sensitive and easily angered]; it does not take into account a wrong endured. It does not rejoice at injustice, but rejoices with the truth [when right and truth prevail]. Love bears all things [regardless of what comes], believes all things [looking for the best in each one], hopes all things [remaining steadfast during difficult times], endures all things [without weakening]. Love never fails [it never fades nor ends]. But as for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for the gift of special knowledge, it will pass away. ‘ 1 Corinthians 13:4-8
    • Word of God helps us know God will bless
    • Word of God shows us what love is
    • We have to apply it
  • Be sensitive to one another
    • Be aware
    • Verbalize it and don’t allow to get caught off guard
    • When you will dream the dream with your spouse and run it with them
    • God will do something in your heart
    • Refining becoming one
    • Flesh comes in and points to what you aren’t getting and brings you down the wrong road
    • You can never outgive a woman
    • Not just what you are doing but you are absorbing
    • Love my wife and help her rather than what’s on my list
    • If noticing a tone, need to draw closer and help her, lift her up
    • If seeing fear, need to pour into her life
    • Can’t dismiss her opinion
  • Intimacy
    • God’s design is it is between 2
    • One more than 2 then not intimate
    • It goes from I DO at the wedding to I WILL for the rest of the life
    • Have to live out and choose them
    • Have the conversation, are we satisfied
    • We take time about everything else, why shouldn’t the most important topic be discussed
    • Don’t allow it to die off
    • Walk it to health
    • Have the conversation whatever it takes
  • God in creative plan created man and woman and they become 1 flesh
  • Ruining it so much because sex isn’t for dating, it is to happen with someone committed to you (wife)
  • Be aware of wrong teaching in our day and time
  • Can’t pour garbage into the car and it run right any more than into your marriage and kids
  • Don’t take the bait
  • Shield and protect yourself
  • No shame to do the right thing
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